In my slow read through the book of Acts, I've been thinking a lot about Stephen. I wrote down the way he is described:
a man full of God's grace and power
full of the Holy Spirit
full of faith
full of wisdom
full of light
full of love and mercy
I can't say those things about myself.
Sometimes I just feel empty. Not wise enough. Lacking grace needed to love certain people. Without motivation and power to obey.
Oh how I want to be full.
So I'm reading a book - "The Saving Life of Christ" by Major W. Ian Thomas. Written in 1961, which almost makes it a classic, it's a study in what it should mean to a believer to have Christ's indwelling. The God of creation living in me. In other words, FULLNESS.
Living totally dependent on the life of Christ in me.
Released from the pressure and even the influence of circumstances, personal inadequacies, self-sufficiency and the fear of man. Sound impossible? Only if it's up to me to make it happen.
Major Thomas' main theme, taken straight from God's word, is that our true identity is to be a human vehicle of divine life. What would that look like in my life?
It means "relating everything, moment by moment as it arises, to the adequacy of what He is in me. Exposing every situation, by faith, as it arises, to the all-sufficiency of the One who indwells me."
So I should ask my Self: Is this difficult thing too hard for God in me? Is this the one thing He can't do?
How much can God do through me? Everything. He's limited only by how much I withhold from Him.
Is there any situation, problem or responsibility for which Jesus Christ in me is not adequate?
Not a single one!
I looked up "full" in the Greek and found it means:
a hollow vessel filled up
covered in every part
covered in every part
thoroughly permeated with
complete - lacking nothing
The tricky part is coming to God empty. I can't come with my own plans or expectations, my list of what works for me - according to my schedule, my ability, my level of comfort.
I have to come hollow.
If only that were as easy as I often sing about and talk about. Really, it means asking God to search my heart and show me everything I'm relying on other than Him. And then honestly admitting those things are truly preventing me from experiencing fullness.
If I could somehow get the truth of how incredibly able He is in me...
"Now to Him Who, by the action of His power that is at work within us, is able to carry out His purpose and do superabundantly, far over and above all that we dare ask or think, infinitely beyond our highest prayers, desires, thoughts, hopes, or dreams..." Eph 3:20 Amplified
Don't you want to live like that? If I will yield to Him, He will absolutely amaze me with His power and glory in and around my life.
Lord, help me in this. Make me full of You!